Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Spankings and Fights

ok first..... I had the "worst" belting I've ever had today. it still hurts an hour later which is super duper rare for me/us. I normally cannot feel a spanking much after, but he was really serious and it stuck. It was because I keep not eating and because I called myself a lot of names last night online in an attempt to have people yell at me/tell me different because i felt so emotionally out of control. But instead of asking for help I manipulated with me words.

That was good. Good Dommy Hubby - here is your cookie. ;-)

But Now....

O.M.G. That man is on my last nerve. You CANNOT tell me to be an adult, that I am not a child, that being a little subby wifey and great and cute, but you need me to be an adult and take care of myself and discuss things "as equals" (his words not mine) and then when we discuss things be pissed when I keep saying that I don't agree with your viewpoint!!! Either you accept the forced "Ok, I will submit" or you accept the genuine "I genuinely do not think I did anything wrong and here is why", but you are not going to get a genuine "adult" "You're right I am wrong" because I DONT THINK I AM WRONG!!! 
The "story" is that he knew i needed a new cellphone, we have been talking about it for weeks, I have been phoneless for weeks, an amazing deal came up today AND my old phone sold today, so it would put us at -45 in the bank. We have a 300 overdraft protection, and he gets paid on friday. I decided this was a viable option/plan and bought the phone. He is all pissed that I didn't consult him, he doesn't agree with my reasoning or my choice, he doesn't like that I did this "independently".... I wasnt going behind his back. We had agreed on getting me a new phone. The only part that we didnt agree on was doing it today and this specific phone.

Now to be fair to him the money from selling my phone had not come through yet, so we are actually -145 instead of -45... but still....

Anyways any thoughts on this?? And I told him I was going to vent now and he said that it better be respectfully done because the people on here know the difference and it looks bad on him if I am not.:-p


  1. Hi Polly,

    Oh my... Um, well.... So I am being supportive in you took action and probably pulled in a great deal!! :0)

    But um.. perhaps maybe you should have talked with him about it and the timing of the money and all of it before acting. I know that I would be in BIG time trouble had I done what you did too. Sorry, I was super supportive first right!?! :0)

    Sending lots of positive energy and thoughts your way, hoping the two of you get this worked out quickly.

    Irish Lucky

  2. LOL-- I'm with Irish Lucky. I totally support you. ;) And, um, yeah... big purchases that put you into overdraft should probably be discussed. <3

  3. *raspberries to you both.... followed by Big Hugs and much thanks* *grin*

    I think y'all are right. I just don't like it.

    His desire is that I just give him a call or email "is this okay" and I don't want to ask if it is okay I want to just do it. I don't like having to ask permission. he says his job is to make sure it is easy for me to ask, that he doesn't make me feel guilty or bad and that he generally supports my decision, and it's my job to ask. I don't like to ask. I like to act. :-p

    Ok "funny comment" my friend was essentially like "In cases where the Dom needs to make sure the Subby is eating, he needs to be more hands on in things like that" Lol! :-p

  4. Um well NOT going to get in the middle of THAT fight. BUT I know how difficult it is to ask- even if 9 times out of 10 Barney will say yes. Scratch that 9.9 times out of 10. Heck I can't even recall a time he has said NO. YET it is still difficult for me to ask. I think that is the most difficult part of 'submission' for me. I think for me at least I am stubbornly prideful about it.

    Knowing my husband he would be upset because now we are HALF way into the overdraft. I may use overdraft as part of our income, where as he uses it as protection- ya know, the way it is intended. Darn men and their deductive reasoning!! Basically you have made his paycheck $100 less- even if you did need the phone...Ooops I wasn't going to get involved.

    My first rule was no spin doctoring. So in this case, if I knew in my heart what I did was wrong, I wasn't allowed to sugar coat it, or come up with reasons why I couldn't ask, if they weren't valid. Meh...asking SUCKS! But it is necessary in any relationship actually. Informing the other of major financial decisions when possible.

    Good luck with the future asking

    1. We <3 you. *laugh* And I think you are right right right!!! ***HUG*** 'tis SO hard to ask, but it's good for both of us. It puts me in a place of dependence and vunerability. And it puts him in a place to extend love and grace and compassion. And wisdom. lol.

  5. You're learning and that ain't all bad - right? Dependence and vulnerability aren't places I like to vacation either but to experience his grace, compassion, wisdom and LOVE certainly makes it better.