Last night My Man and I had a(n insanely) long conversation and throughout the conversation he kept saying he wants "respect" from me. I kept telling him ways I show him respect (thanking him for being such a hard worker and provider, speaking highly of his care for me in public, etc), but he kept saying "I love that, but you don't respect me." He kept saying "Respect means "yes sir" when I say something." Which... I do. So, I don't get it.
What does respect mean to you?? In terms of your relationship with your husband/top/dom/whatever? In general?
It was definitely easy to walk away from our conversation feeling like "respect" means "do whatever i tell you to do except in those strictly defined situations where you are trying to get spanked." Or even more to mean "believe things about me that are not true."Like that he is the "strongest most dominating presence I have ever met and there is no one who compares to him." I don't know... we have these conversations every few months and I get discouraged and confused each time.
It all started because the words "You're just pretending to be dominant" slipped out of my mouth, and when I say slipped it was like the words came out and before the "ant" was out I was already looking physically shocked. I didn't mean it to say he isn't an amazing husband or that I don't love and respect him, but I just abhor falseness or fakeness. And at that moment he was pulling out a persona that isn't himself and comes across very...fake. I don't know.
In other new we are starting our Christmas celebrations today. We are going to his Grandmother's about 3 hours away... I am so exhausted and worn out. I feel like I am never gonna make it. :-p